My Time thoughts

My time thoughts

Recently I talked with my Cousin about some business and to catch up on things. We hadn’t spoken for some time and the conversation began with reaffirmation of friendship our and assurances of not letting long passages of time to go by without staying in contact.

The wireless reunion proved to be lively informative laced with laughter, remembrance of a family both of those still with among the and sad commemoration for those no longer.

The conversation was familiar and reminiscences of youth proved to be a refreshing tonic away from the strenuous task of growing old.

I had talked to his sister earlier in the month, and she informed me that the ‘formerly’ notorious Mr. A, had gotten ‘ligion and was now one of Jesus’ fiercest warriors living the life of peaceful sainthood.

At 73 years there wasn’t many choices left, I thought.

Before I go further, at the introduction of X, I stated categorically that I did not engage in conversation with Christians who I find to be brained washed dupes shepherded by . . .

*

But now they that are younger than I have me in derision,

whose fathers I would have disdained to have set with the dogs of my flock. . . .

. . . He also shall be my salvation:

for an hypocrite shall not come before him.

Hear diligently my speech,

and my declaration with your ears.

Behold now,

I have ordered my cause;

I know that I shall be justified.

*

. . .Who they defend with closed minded fervor.

I was raised to be a Baptist. I was born in New York City and worshiped ensconced  among the newly migrated, southerners, my grandmother included, Columbia South Carolina.

All freshly up from down younda the Southern Baptist worshipers were a rousing spirited exuberant worship all expressed in both preaching and music that has since become a familiar sound of soul in the earth.

The message preached was a basic no frills education. In all things, moderation stay patience for the lord's work is slow in coming but always on time.

Love for one another and most importantly reject the temptations and riches of this world.

Remember and do these things and when he returns he’ll find you to be a good and faithful servant, an acceptable bride.

After my mother's second marriage she erased her past, me and moved to Nebraska.

At seven years of age and for the next eight brief years, I lived with my grandmother. Living with the grand lady I attended services every Sunday at, Greater Central Baptist Church in New York’s Harlem.

At 6 years of age, I was baptized at the same in the basement of the edifice forgetting to take my shoes and socks off. I still remember the squashy walk home.

I cherish my childhood days at Central and still embrace it to be my, home Church.

‘May the lord watch between me an thee while we are absent one from the other, Amen’ It’s that sought of thing.

Mary, my grandmother was a brilliant woman, not the cuddly cookie baking kind, but the no-nonsense expecting the image of a man to be evident in the boy.

I was a playful, mischievous, precocious boy who expecting companions to follow my instructions to the letter. I haven’t changed much, just gotten older and expect far less from men.

On those formal occasion when I was forced out of  my ‘play clothes’ and into a suit and tie, then introduced to people,  I would recite my well-rehearsed handshake and response to any questions, in a clear voice, yes mama, yes sir.

No mumbling or street vernacular was acceptable.

After hearing the music to my mothes ears, he’s so well mannered, smart, good looking, he’s going to make a fine preacher and so forth, I was set free to find the other well-mannered children.

My grandmother, saw it her duty to prepare Samuel to serve God and take my rightful place in the earth.

She loved me with every fiber of her mind, body and soul. I wish I was matured enough to thoroughly appreciate that living gift of god and express to her my love and appreciation for all she’s done for me..

My dearly beloved grandmother was the only one and I dare say the last one to love me so.

There is not a day that go’s by that I don’t think of her.

She was instrumental in bringing  Central Baptist into existence and influential in both the spiritual and political affairs of Harlem until her untimely death on August 16 1959.

Her funeral rivaled W.C Handy.

When she died, my mother having no other chose, I was shuttled off to Nebraska to be reunited with her where I became the proverbial, red-headed stepchild.

It was a shock to my young pampered system, I’ll tell you that.

Whereas Mary was a fearless, hand of the Lord who never doubted his purpose for herself or for me.

My mother was fear ridden convert, afraid of death, life, poverty, being alone and whereas I leaned on Mary for guidence, my mother leaned on my sister and me for anything we could provide..

She feared the lord but she was not so afraid as to be fanatical about him or religion.

Her church life and attendance was mottled. She was what I would describe to be, a Gypsy Saint.

Following after the latest holy fad and flamboyant and bombastic shepherd of the day.

My Grandmother worshiped in a house of stone, my mother in tents.

Going from tent to tent gave the whole religious experience a circus like feel.

During service people milling about, the preacher calling for the sick, lame, the simple of which there were many.

They sputtered in tongues, a babbling language which gave proof that the holy ghost abided within them, as the spirit  transmitted a secret message only god understood many in attendee babbled  too.

The preacher would for a time dramatically rip their shirts to shred then sell the pieces for as much as the traffic could bare because the shirt was now a holy article.

A prayer cloth no less said to be worth more as bits of rags than the Sears shirt was brand new all because the charlatan selling the sweated garment said it was now holy due to perspirering in it.

In California for a time those spiritual spokespeople seem to have come off an assembly line, a new clown every few minutes.

I finished high school, no longer being dragged to the circus, I joined the United States Army. I served for three years, first with the 82 Airborne and then the 7^th Cav. Airmobile in Viet Nam. Sick, wounded and near death, I was sent home to finish my tour of duty.

At 22 years of age on Aug 12, 1967, I was discharged and I was a total wreck.

All memory of my youth, replaced with only God knows what. I was hurting badly.

I never turned to drugs or alcohol and the church had long since lost it appeal.

I got a job, the pay was decent but offered no solace after seven months lost I walk through Inglewood and I went into a bookstore to look around and bought a Bible. To this day I have immersed until I knew myself ready to share.

I held the job but was burdened with wanderlust. So I drew out all my savings and went in search of Me.

Out of funds, I used my G.I and went to college in Michigan I graduated Lansing Community College with a A.A in social science and set about to write a novel, Touch the Throne. Which turn out to be a best nonseller.

By the 1970’ties the church I grew up in was completely gone replaced by an unrecognizable behemoth whose main objective to generate cash.

The new church was polished sanitized taking on an extension of the earth it professed to be apart from.

No people, spirit, hope, love, just a vacuous, cold uncaring, frightening tomb that generated money.

Its preacher preached a wealth faith, usually their wealth and the saints became merchandize.

Preacher begin to present themselves as ‘teachers’ creating a patrician between themselves and the old fire an brimstone preacher.

The primary difference being they didn’t sweat.

Their message preceded the written word and the word was used to authenticate their words and drives.

Their pursuits were formed into the image of God which became very much as the image of themselves.

They taught that, their fine clothing, automobiles, homes and ‘high maintenance wives’ (actual words of pastor Frederick Price) was exactly what the lord wanted for them and for all his son and daughter.

They sterilized the word of lord from all  fleshly participation, namely, patience.   

And taught, that they were the finished product of gods works and recipient gods rewards, money and all you needed was faith.

Reading,

***

Romans 1:17  | View whole chapter   | See verse in context

For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith:

as it is written,

The just shall live - by faith.

(That was like polishing shit.)

**

Now what the scripture say)

***

And the Lord answered me,

and said,

Write the vision,

and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it.

For the vision is yet for an appointed time,

but at the end it shall speak, and not lie:

though it tarry,

wait for it;

because it will surely come,

it will not tarry.

Behold,

his soul which is lifted up is not upright in him:

but the just shall live by - his - faith.

***

The earth was no longer of place to disdained because of it’s flagrant disregards for Thy law, rather the earth had become a place where god and the wicked could abide together in perfect harmony.

Israel brought into subjection in the year 1619,  and who stayed under their teaching were said to be able to navigate around all of Satan’s enticing wrangles, grow rich and still remain in gods good mercies living as the lord  had intended for his children, the righteous along side the wicked.

**

And saith unto him,

All these things will I give thee,

if thou wilt fall down and worship me.

***

And the man said,

They are departed hence;

for I heard them say,

Let us go to Dothan.

And Joseph went after his brethren,

and found them in Dothan.

  And when they saw him afar off,

even before he came near unto them,

they conspired against him to slay him.

**

Then saith Emmanuel unto him,

Get thee hence,

Satan:

for it is written,

Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God,

and him only shalt thou serve.

**

He also that received seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word;

and the care of this world,

and the deceitfulness of riches,

choke the word,

and he becometh unfruitful.

**

Now the message completely void of any spiritual acknowledgment leaves the wolves to ravage the flock.

They grow rich on the blood of the innocent and no longer encumbered by Thy knowledge, they feed insatiably.    

this left some to wonder. Where is the difference between the Saints and the wicked if both are now free to grasp for riches without offending Thy law?

The main stay of the old sweaty church taught us to reject the riches of the world keeping the flock in fearful remembrance, ‘the love of money was the root of all evil.’

The new church was pressed to find a new offense the saints could embrace as the quintessential wickedness, aside from money.

A new paradigm that was designated as the ultimate SIN the saints were to avoid if they were to stay ‘pure’.

**

Leave it to Saul to patch that little discrepancy up.

**

1 Corinthians 6, 7

Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you,

because ye go to law one with another.

Why do ye not rather take wrong?

why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded?

*

(I have no idea of what any of that means. I Continue)

*

Nay,

*

(This I do know)

And Sarah was an hundred and seven and twenty years old:

these were the years of the life of Sarah.

And Sarah died in Kirjatharba; the same is Hebron in the land of Canaan:

and Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for her. . .

. . . Nay,

my lord,

hear me:

the field give I thee,

and the cave that is therein,

I give it thee;

in the presence of the sons of my people give I it thee:

bury thy dead.

 (Continue.)

****

ye do wrong,

and defraud,

and that your brethren.

Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God?

Be not deceived:

neither fornicators,

nor idolaters,

nor adulterers,

nor effeminate, (Whoop dar’ it is!)

 nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

Nor thieves,

nor covetous,

nor drunkards,

nor revilers,

nor extortioners,

shall inherit the kingdom of God.

And such were some of you:

but ye are washed,

but ye are sanctified,

but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus,

and by the Spirit of our God.

All things are lawful unto me,

but all things are not expedient:

all things are lawful for me,

but I will not be brought under the power of any.

*******

A new apparel was sown, the cloak of ‘Self Righteousness’ my riches is living proof  of gods love for me because I’m none of those things, (any more). I cleaned my act up after my second wife.

Leaving this teaching of the Christ Emmanuel to non  affect.

**

Judge not,

that ye be not judged.

For with what judgment ye judge,

ye shall be judged:

**

  Therefore my people are gone into captivity,

because they have no knowledge:

and their honourable men are famished,

and their multitude dried up with thirst.

Therefore hell hath enlarged herself,

and opened her mouth without measure:

and their glory,

and their multitude,

and their pomp,

and he that rejoiceth,

shall descend into it.

**

and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.

**

But these two things shall come to thee in a moment in one day,

the loss of children,

and widowhood:

they shall come upon thee in their perfection for the multitude of thy sorceries,

and for the great abundance of thine enchantments.

For thou hast trusted in thy wickedness:

thou hast said,

None seeth me.

***

So judgment and hatred now replaced good old sweaty ‘ligion.

Now at Central there attended a homosexual married couple, friends of my grandmother and in good standing with congregation and everybody knew Mrs. Doll’s daughter, who sat beside her in the choir  was Lesbian and Mr. Goodmen’s twelve year old son was certainly gay.

Nobody cared nobody judged nor could they, everybody labored under the weight of their own Cross..

.

The new teaching now the designated Evil, the faithful are  encouraged to hate because it was taught  the lord himself despises them most?

ISamuelyeaon